Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Eat the Cake!

At a certain point in your life you realise that you get older (you may have read about this).

There's the old people that love life, holidaying around the country, pointing at cathedrals and large flying birds whilst going "Oooh!".  There's also the old people that are unhappy, swearing at parents with loud children or yelling at clouds.

That’s not the way you should age. You should be as alive as you can until you’re totally dead.

This is of course dangerous.  You should take advice from others when doing things and not be gung-ho about it. You have to be sensible. You don’t want your last words to be “Hey is this off?” or “Hey everybody, watch this!”.

You change, your body changes.  Things become a tender box down there. It definitely won’t be the world’s best thing to be found charred & handcuffed to your other half at the age of 83. I don’t want to use the word lube, but I think I just did.

The world is confusing, there’s no doubt about it. You've got to be on good terms with pleasure and make the beast inside you happy.

Beast? What beast?  If you don't know about it, you ignore it at your own peril!

The beast inside you only has one request from you…


This is what we deal with every day of our lives.  The constant fighting of the boo-hoo with the yummy yummy, the bad and the good.

You just got to know what the good stuff is and what the bad stuff is.

The good stuff is everything that you're not allowed to do.  Like cake.

Cake is great.  Eat cake.

Seriously, whoever invented cake was a god damn f*cking genius.

Why ignore Cake!  Especially around Christmas, birthdays etc..  Cake makes you happy.  Do more stuff that you reckon is the good stuff!

The bad stuff is things like, you know.. erghh.. F*CKING MORNINGS.. I hate mornings, why dammit, why!

"Rush rush, we're going to be late", stuff that.  What's going to happen if you're late?  You can rock up late wearing a Tutu that smells like fish, the same shit is going to be there..

Whatever you do, remember more yummy yummy.

If anyone ever offers you a cake, you eat that massive slice of spongey, creamy goodness and you are going to love every god dam minute of it!

Ohh my god yes..

- tork