Saturday, April 28, 2012

Just Random Thoughts to Share With You

Really uncertain where this post is going to go.


Facebook.  A site where I push like upon a whole bunch of pages similar to my own site.  The success of other parent's sites is amazing.

But jealousy is one cruel mother.

It's just a stupid like on a page for gods sake!

I should be doing real work at home and not counting all these likes on popular sites!

Anyway.. the delving I did into requesting friends to hit like upon my page.. it grew to the knowing of friends once liking my page now no longer liking it.

Man, I wish I never saw that.  Honest people, lovely folk. I wonder just how annoying I sometimes might be that they took the effort to unlike me.

I hate Facebook.  You bastard.

Twitter!  Now there is a lovely friend.  Never a day passes where a little "tweet" noise hits my phone.  I love getting tweets.

Love it.

Facebook... Grrrr! You ugly step sister *shakes fist*

Why can't you be more like Twitter where people love following me and saying "Hi! How's the family?"

I wish I understood you better Facebook, but like family, I must accept you for who you are.

That annoying half cousin that always asks you what colour shoes you are wearing.

You don't make sense to me but I suppose I'll still play ball with you in the park..

Yeah.. so.. ok.. that was weird.

If you know how Facebook works, hit LIKE on my facebook page :-)

Think I might have a wee beverage with bubbles in it.

- tork

Friday, April 27, 2012

Subscribe and never miss a Giveaway!

Every now and then I have the opportunity to run giveaways for my awesomely fantastic readers like yourself. So I was thinking, there should be a way to provide every reader with an email of whenever a giveaway is being run at Tork's blog.

So I've provided to you Tork's Giveaway newsletter. An email subscription where I will send you a neat little email in your inbox whenever I run a giveaway so you never miss one!

You might not be interested in some of the bollocks I write here at Tork's blog, so this is a great way to stay informed for giveaways without all that boring stuff!

Fyi Tork, your stuff isn't boring. Your stuff is better than sliced bread. Sliced gold bread. Sliced gold bread made by 14 blonde beauties with ample bosom and soothing bread massage hands. From your pal, Tork.

Thanks Tork!

So click subscribe, or that monkey there, so you never miss out on a giveaway.

That's only if you like winning free stuff!

Click the Monkey!

..and don't worry, I hate SPAM as much as you do.  You'll only ever receive info for giveaways run from this blog!

The next giveaway is soon, so make sure you sign up and don't miss it!

- tork

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Guest Post from Just a Dizzy Dad

I want to showcase more sites these days.  If I find someone's blog great, I'm going to show it to you, especially if they are new or crave exposure.

So let me introduce to you Just a Dizzy Dad. A dad who I thought was an Australian dad blogger like myself.  Only recently did I realise he was American.  God I'm a slow one..

But in my books, that's a great compliment.  I assumed because he is down to earth and all about his kid that he was an Aussie.  He's unlike other US blogs I have seen, which is refreshing. A simple blog that just talks about his daily dadding life :-)

I'm lucky enough to have him guest post for me, so here it is.


Just a Dizzy Dad: First off, I am a stay at home dad, and I love being able to stay home and watch the boy grow and learn. It is somehow amusing, heartbreaking, and absurd all at the same time, and the material I post on my blog stems from my everyday life events.

You never know what you’re going to get.

P.s. Thank you Tork for letting me guest post! I am amazingly honored!

That Impostor Stole MY Hug

Well, yesterday was certainly interesting. Pizzly mistook some other mom for Mama Bear, not just for a moment either, but for around an hour. To be fair, the resemblance was certainly uncanny. Even I got confused when I first glanced across the park and spotted this Mama Bear impostor pushing a stroller towards us!

But, unlike the Pizzmeister, I quickly determined that it was not in fact Mama Bear.

After all, why would Mama Bear go to the park with someone else's little girl, cute as she was? Mama Bear already has her own cute little boy to play with. He's sitting next to me lapping up chicken noodle soup like a good little puppy right now as I type this.

So, why on earth would she hijack someone else's bratling?

Anyway, just because I knew it wasn't Mama Bear doesn't mean that Pizzly didn't know it, and I am really glad that this young lady and her daughter were so incredibly nice about it! In fact, they are the first two to ever come and play with us at the park when Mama Bear wasn't with us.

I don't know, maybe Pizzly informally adopting them might have had something to do with it, but I doubt it.

What truly matters though is that the Pizzmeister had a great time, his new little pal was having a great time, and even the little girl's mom was having fun. I, on the other hand, didn't really matter that much and was starting to get a little jealous.


Because, usually, the boy runs up to me and insists that I hug him and kiss him off and on throughout the day, including while at the park. And, if he should fall and get an ouchie? I am the "go to guy," unless of course Mama Bear is home. Then I'm chopped liver.

But, today was a different story. Instead of running up to me and getting his hugs and kisses on, he went to The Impostor, a stranger he just met!

At first, I was alright with it. I even laughed and shrugged it off, and then it went too far.

Poor Pizzly fell off of an obstacle and bumped his poor little head. Of course, I held my arms out and got ready for the "I need you to make me feel better hug," but did the little brat want me? No. Instead, he ran over to The Impostor!

To her credit, she looked a little embarrassed and sad for me because my kid chose her over me for comfort, but she still picked him up and kissed his head to make it feel better, like any mom probably would.

That made it better for the boy, but it didn't make it better for me.

"How dare this nice young woman steal my hugs away from me?!" I thought to myself. Those "I need you to comfort me" hugs are what I live for!

Otherwise, I don't get any hugs, and I needs me some hugs!

Man, I was so jealous! I even told her I was jealous that's how jealous I was. Then I called her a "Toddler love stealing Thief!" She laughed at me.

But, this was no joke! She stole that hug from me like a thief in the night! That might have been the best hug I'd have gotten from him all week too!

Usually, I get stuck with the "Daddy leave me be!" hugs where I am so desperate for a hug or a cuddle I have to sneak it up on him before he pushes me away. The last thing I need is some Impostor stealing my one chance for a decent hug from him.

Then, as if that wasn't enough to ruin my day, The Impostor made him cry like someone had just killed his puppy in front of him when she left the park. It was truly heart wrenching and humorous in a sick and twisted kind of way.

This rad lady and her daughter said goodbye and started walking away when Pizzly decided to chase after them crying "No, Mommy! No Leave Me!" That of course stopped her in her tracks, and it looked like she was starting to get teary eyed too, which made me start to giggle of course because I'm a dick, and this situation was totally absurd.

Eventually, I caught up to Pizzly, picked him up, told him that that wasn't Mama Bear and that Mama Bear went to work and would be home soon after his nap after lunch, but did he believe me? Nope.

So, when Rad Mom and her rad daughter went to leave again Pizzly had a melt down, total shit fit, hysterical crying tantrum! I mean this was the worst tantrum he had ever tossed. Then, as Impostor Mom got further away he started crying inconsolably, screaming out "MAMA!!! I WANT MAMA!!" as he was holding his little hands out towards her. It was truly moving.

Unfortunately, this crying session lasted for 45 minutes and could only be cured by the production of a lemonade flavored Popsicle ready for consumption. I am glad I had some on hand.

Note to self: Must get more lemonade flavored Popsicles!

P.s. Thank you rad Mama Bear look a like for playing with us at the park even if it did cause lots of drama. It means a lot to us, knowing that people like you will give us a chance before deciding to run in fear from us.

Monday, April 16, 2012

I miss Friday Work drinks. CheekyDrop to the rescue!

I miss the old Friday after work drinks. I'd walk down with 10 to 20 work colleagues to the local on most Friday's and just shoot the breeze. We'd pick the worst songs possible on the jukebox, order rounds of beer spiked with cordial to mess with people's mind, and stumble home via public transport yelling at imaginary shool kids on the bus. Perhaps that was just me, but it still was a great way to get to know your workmates and have a bit of a cool off after a long week.

..every week was a long week!..

Work changes and you don't see your old colleagues anymore. My work changed to a few streets over. The local pub didn't change though. New faces to buy rounds for and new people to embarrass myself infront of for the following Monday stories.

It's disappointing that the work place is not often the venue for Friday work drinks. OH&S is a big culprit for work place drinks being a distant memory. I think it would be great to nab the culprits for making Friday work place drinks a dying event. Parents like myself would love the opportunity to pop a bottle at work. I just don't have the time to venture down the pub any more for those hours that I used to. A couple of drinks at my desk with staff would be such a better option to wind down.

Well, Cheeky Drop is a new website that is the Ambassador for Friday work drinks. They heard on the grapevine that I enjoy the odd drop of vino, so they kindly contacted me to tell me how I could win FREE work place drinks!

Ooooh yeah. Me likey!

Every Friday, CheekyDrop is offering the chance to win free work drinks! (Aust residents only)

Check out one of their clips, the Friday Drinks Offender, Mr Smooth Operator.

FYI - Random Squirrel.  Love it. Hehehehe..

They're giving away a case of wine each week, so check them out via @cheekydrop, their Facebooky place or where you can also buy wine online.

So I'm looking forward to organising myself and getting the work folk together one day for a few drinks. Winning that case of wine will help the cause!

Looking forward to the Squirrel delivering it too.  If it happens, I will definitely wet myself.


Hope you guys check them out to get some free work wines too.

- tork

Saturday, April 14, 2012

I am a nominee for Sydney Writer's Blogger of the Year

It would seem I am a nomiee for the Sydney Writer's Australian blog of the year!

Sure I am one of many, but, well, that's still exciting now, isn't it?

I'm up for the people's choice award. It goes to the most popular. So, won't you vote for me? :-)

Click me --->  People's choice award  <--- Click me

I'm on page 5 in the T-Z section.. (once your past every blog that starts with "THE" heheehe)

I just want an honourable mention of some description!

Let's see how we go.. let me know if you vote for me and I'll tweet your blog (if you have one) in return.

If the beautiful and/or handsome judges are reading this, thanks for simply honouring me with your eyes to read upon this stuff that I write. ...mum always told me, flattery will get you everywhere. :-)

 Wish me luck! And good luck all the others in the Parenting category.

- tork

Friday, April 13, 2012

Bad Blogger Step 5: A Letter To Me

Welcome to Step 5 in my I'm a Bad Blogger series. You can find my original bad blogger post here.

Yes, I'm still writing about how you can pretty much do anything when blogging. The experts might tell you that you shouldn't do blah blah blah etc, but why not if you love doing it!  Here's me writing to myself..

Apparently a no-no! :-)

5. Write as if you were writing to yourself

Hey Tork, it's Tork here.  Just wanted to let you know a few things.

Firstly, you're rad! *insert high five here*

Secondly, you're old man!  30 years old sure has snuck up quick! Don't think I haven't seen you getting out of the car as if you were 80 years old. You sure are losing a bit of fitness in your old age now aren't you? Why don't you start playing more sport? Been ages since you smacked a tennis ball.

Buy yourself that set of golf clubs you've been craving to start playing. Don't lose your fitness just because you've been too busy playing with your kid, who I dare say, is scarily becoming more and more like you. Hehehehe.

Yeah, that kid of yours sure is growing fast.  He'd almost be a year old now hey? All those health problems has really drained it out of you and your wife though hasn't it.. I just hope the overnight hospital stays you did on those terribly uncomfortable beds didn't give you health problems of your own with a sore back! Glad you stayed though every night. I think your boy loved always having someone by his side.

Your boy looks great now though, crawling at extreme speeds is more fun for him than working out that standing thing, isn't it? Hehheehehe. And he's saying words when you were told he wasn't able to!


I don't know how he picked up the word "the". How are you ever going to explain what "the" means?  Good luck with that.

Anyway, I'm getting side-tracked. I wanted to tell you, well done on sticking it out with your dad blog. Keep at it because there isn't many of you and it'll be great to one day look back on what you've written, especially when that memory loss sets in.

But, you've been working too hard! Take a holiday with your family. Get away for a weekend and recharge. I know you can't afford it, but you should just do it anyway. Figure it out and go have some fun.

Life is often full of crap things, like mornings before work.. Ergh!

Cotton balls... blah!

Finding out the Milk was off that you drank this morning.. bleh BLergh!

Do less bleh, no's, and why's... Do more, YES! and WOO! and YUM YUM!

Eat cake.. cake is great.

Anyway, that will do it from me, so I hope all is well. Make sure you send love to your mum from me.

All the best.

- tork

ps. I boinked your wife. my bad.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Dad and Son Poem - Shadow Games

Bear with me.. because I'm in the mood for writing some poetry :-)

Shadow Games

It was there as any other night, with son clasping upon his shoulder,
Dark figures against the wall catches eye of young and older.
Yet these figures of darkness are not as bleak as it could maybe seem.
They catch the eye of dad and son, a new game they haven't seen.

The light is dim above the earth, but bulb sure lights things bright.
And with this bulb does each one see their shadows of the night.
A snigger from the son, a grin bore from the dad.
A game not seen is this house of shadow puppets with the lad.

But bedtime nears when day turns night and sleepiness rears it's head.
But fighting sleep is what is done when playing with your dad.
A wave at your shadow on a wall, not knowing what it is,
A great new game for dad and son, in age they'd surely miss.

Now time to rest as Autumn breeze sweeps coolly through the night.
All snug and tucked up warm in bed for son to sleep tonight.
As dad reminds himself this night how lucky that he is.
With photographs of memories of dad and son... of an age he'll surely miss.

- tork

Monday, April 9, 2012

This Aussie dad is a proud blogger

So I was having an off day after having looked at the recent Kid Spot Top 50 bloggers in Australia. Not one single male in the whole list.  And also reading their judging criteria, point two of their criteria states this:

  • 2) Community
The judges also looked at how well the blogger engages with her audience with comments and questions, both on her blog and off-site on platforms like Twitter or Facebook.

How well the blogger engages with her audience, both on her blog and offsite platforms.

It's disappointing, being a popular parenting site. Anyway, thought I'd share with you a tweet I did via @Torkona3.

Just realised how bad my grammar was.. "what keeps my going"?  Bah! Stoopid keyboard ;-)

So even though I might not ever get recognition dad blogging, I've moved past the whole "oi, look over at me! I babble about parenting stuff too!" I'm doing it to reflect on memories for the future, for the odd bit of dollars to feed my family, and the free booze in the mail (thanks WineSelectors hehehe).

Am I bitter or jealous though? Sure..

Would I be happier with this sort of recognition?  Honestly.. nahh.  At least, not any more.

Like I said, what keeps me going is my passion in life as a father in Australia land. As long as time permits, I'll be pushing these buttons on my keyboard, trying to not let anything bother me.

But before I go, the Kid Spot Top 50 competition is still a great idea.  If there is anyone I would suggest you voting for, it's A Baby Called Max.  Vote for her here.  All the best Cherie!

- tork

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Check out From Boardroom to Babies

Hey there..

So I was recently contacted by a brand new blogger, From Boardroom to Babies.

Ahh, I remember being a new blogger.  Gun-ho, weary eyed and excited for future prospects.

But I was just after people to link me, to give me a bit of traffic. To tell people that I existed!

Well, I'm all about sharing and caring, especially for newbies on the scene, and this blog looks like it is going to be popular in no time.  I just want to make it clear..

..i found her first, I found her first! :-)

Check out Coming Home After a Caesarian. A guide for dads on how to look after their wife after such an operation. Very useful.

So go check her out.  If your new to blogging also, get in touch and I'd love to help you out too.

You never know your luck, I might give you a SEO love blog post too :-)

All the best Mel!

- tork

Sunday, April 1, 2012

An Autumn dinner date, care of WineSelectors

Ahh Autumn.  It starts to rain lots, it gets colder, a lot less time is spent at the beach.

This morning I took a nice hot shower, only to step out of it into a freezing bathroom.  I like that, weird aren't I?  Coldness reminds you that you are alive! :-)  I'm certain to get over it once winter actually hits.

But snuggling a few extra minutes longer in bed warmth is a joy in life, especially on a Sunday and even when you're the only one in bed.  Thick bed blankets, as thick as the bed itself, makes you never want to leave your bed.  Love it with the cooler weather.

But with coolness comes the love of a fine wine.  Summer is all about the beer and ciders, Autumn & Winter.. it's wine time!

I love a good wine, whether it be about how annoying my wife is or when my footy team sucks.  Ohh, I meant whine there..  But seriously, give me any red wine and I will add it to my wine rack for safe keeping, then take out an older one for a tipple.

I did a bit of bad drunk blogging for something different a while back.  So we already know I occasionally enjoy a drink. noticed this and they gracefully sent me some fine wines to enjoy from their collection! Who says blogging drunk is a silly thing to do? ;-)

Say what?  Wine sent to my door? Hell yes!

Growing up in the wine regions, I know the annoyance of having to drive from cellar door to cellar door sloshed off your face. Delivery to you door is a much safer option!

I'm often finding the desire to head out cellar door shopping, but just don't have the time.  With a company like Wine Selectors, I can bring any cellar door to my own door.

Bad news liver, time to get working again..

I received four wines in the mail. I'm yet to open one, but I will keep you updated of each one when I do.  Last Sunday's Malaysian Formula 1 race, I tried to pop the top off a white for a nice dinner party, but I unfortunately caught the gastro bug this week.

Ergh! I don't wish it upon my worst enemy (except my neighbours, they suck).

So over the next few weeks/months, I will be tweeting or perhaps blogging what I thought of these wines.

Here are their details in the mean time:

Riposte by Tim Knappstein No 1 Pinot Noir 2010 from the Adelaide Hills

  •  Regular delivery program: Regional Series
  • Food Match: Peking Duck
  • Tasting note: This high quality Pinot Noir shows great varietal characters and offers excellent value. It has a vibrant mid red colour with lifted cherry and strawberry aromas. The palate delivers dense red fruit flavours supported by hints of complex oak characters and ripe, velvety tannins. 

Briar Ridge Signature Release Karl Stockhausen Shiraz 2010 from the Hunter Valley

  • Regular delivery program: Hunter Valley Series
  • Food Match: Smokey Barbecue Ribs
  • Tasting note: Briar Ridge has 23 trophy winning wines to its credit and this rich red Shiraz shows why. The nose is sweet, smoky and plummy.  A truly mouth-watering mix! Its approachable palate is generous and plush with great weight and persistent length. Simply fantastic!

Helm Classic Dry Riesling 2011 from the Canberra District

  • Regular delivery program: Winemakers Series
  • Food Match: Char grilled salmon salad
  • Tasting note: Helm Wines was established in 1973 by Riesling specialist Ken Helm and his wife Judy, becoming one of the first commercial wineries in the Canberra district. The fruit for this wine was sourced from four surrounding vineyards with the juice being fermented in stainless steel vats without any oak influence. This wine was sourced from different vineyards to add complexity and interest. On the nose of this pale coloured Riesling you’ll find clean, lifted lime and lemon aromas. It has a super dry and crisp palate with a vibrant core of lime citrus fruit. The mouth-puckering acidity, which will soften with age, ensures great ageing potential. 

Keith Tulloch 2010 Semillon from the Hunter Valley

  • Regular delivery program: Winemakers Series
  • Food Match: Kingfish Carpaccio
  • Tasting Note: Keith Tulloch is a fourth generation winemaker who started his own label in 1997 producing regional classics like this delicious Semillon.  The grapes were sourced from only the best old vines planted in Pokolbin’s deep alluvial sands and it is this special combination of vine age and soil type that consistently produces the best styles of Hunter Valley Semillon available.  This vibrant, straw-yellow wine has a nose of classic lemon and lime aromas with beautiful hints of musk, honeysuckle and bay leaf. It has a generous mouth feel with the variety’s signature citrus drive.  This is a pure and balanced Semillon with lively acidity and length.

Ohh yeah, sounds good! I'd love to try something well fancy like Peking Duck! Love my duck dishes..

Thanks so much to Wine Selectors.  Check out their site today and grab a few bottles for yourself! The have a growing online community, so check them out via Facebook ( and Twitter (@wineselectors) as well!

- tork