Thursday, January 6, 2011

How to choose a name for your baby


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Why is it so hard for my wife and I to pick a name for our expected baby? We can't decide! We’ve had a name for a fair while, now my wife wants to change it!  I am now also not sure the first and middle names go well together.  Bah!

I think that the hardest decision is not whether to have a baby, not which school it should attend, but the decision of what to call it!  Today is an age where everyone is trying to pick a name that is unique. But with unique names running dry, people are turning towards names such as Talon or Sha’neeqwa.  I don’t think it possible to go down that path.  I mean, the first name is part of a bird’s foot for god sake!  The other one just sounds like someone sneezing.  It was so much easier for our parents, or our parents parents.  Names like Betty or Mary.  Classics! John, Paul, George, err, Ringo.  Yeah! How fantastic!

When picking a name, you have to think about what swear word it rhymes with or what terrible nicknames it could get.  Dolores? No way.  Richard? Pfft, forget it. FYI - If you have no idea what Dolores ryhmes with, see this Seinfeld episode here.

So what are we going to do? How do we fricken decide what name to choose?

So I’ve decided to create a guide to help decide what to call a newborn.  See if you agree with me! :-)

1. Don’t worry about what other people think
What ever name you decide upon, someone is not going to like it.  If you’ve told people what you are calling him/her before it is born and someone doesn’t like it, don’t worry about it.  If you change it, someone else is not going to like what you change it to! So you cant win.  Reside in the fact that someone is not going to like it, so prepare yourself to expect it and don’t let it get to you.  Also, don’t tell people the name you pick before it is born!

2. Don’t get too tricky
It’s a good thing to be unique, but we don’t want to have any Quonza’s or Sha-naynay’s out there.  Yeah, take an old fashioned name at remove the odd letter or add perhaps an extra one, but don’t flip it around too much.  My buddy Jyhnee has a heck of a time spelling his name!

3. Don’t ryhme with swear words and watch the nicknames
Mr & Mrs Head should not call their son Richard, and even though the show Glee is really popular right now, I wouldn’t suggest naming your kid after Puck.  Think about what names rhyme with and what swear words imaginative kids could come up with.  You don’t want your kid growing up being teased now, do you?  But don’t worry about it too much.  Kids will always find a way to pick on whatever name, no matter what it is!

4. Don’t follow trends
Twilight may be a popular movie, so go ahead and call you kid Bella or Edward if you like.  But remember, at roll call in school, when announcing the name Bella or Edward, don’t be surprised to watch half the class put their hand up.  That’s not a bad thing, but if you’re after something unique then stay away from naming after trends (The number of Michael’s or Jackson’s out there skyrocketed after his death).

5. Make it mean something to you
If you can (or want), try and make it mean something to you.  Whether it be related to a great memory you have or of a beloved family member, it will mean more to you. Your child can carry it with them to never be forgotten.  This can also help you to pick out a name if you are having trouble.  But, if your best and most beloved memory was in Wagga Wagga with your granny Dolores, you may just want to buy a baby name book and pick one with your eye’s closed ;-)


Hope this list helps us! As well as anyone else out there.   Hopefully my wife and I decide on a name soon.  But don’t forget, it might be a bit of a struggle for now, but we are enjoying the struggle and hope you do too!

- tork

PS. Shout out and much love to anyone called Dolores or Richard!  Especially to all the Sha-neeqwa’s out there ;-)